Category Archives: Social Eating

How Other People Affect Your Eating

Most of us don’t live in isolation. The people closest to you usually know all about your struggles with weight and eating, and can have a profound effect on your Normal Eating journey.

When you’re coming from the diet world, you’re coming from a world in which it’s assumed that you don’t have the self-control or judgment to manage your eating on your own. At one time or another, you may even have recruited friends and family to help you stick to your diet and monitor what you eat.

But in Normal Eating, taking full responsibility for your eating choices is crucial. Normal Eating teaches you to trust yourself – teaches you that you can trust yourself. So when you stop dieting and make the shift to Normal Eating, the "helpful" interjections from family and friends to not eat this or that are no longer welcome – and in fact, interfere with your progress.

The people close to you can sidetrack your efforts in more subtle ways, as well. Whenever someone changes – even when the change is positive – there will be some resistance to the change from those close to the person.

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Eating at Meal Times and Eating from Habit

Do you eat because it’s time to eat, whether you’re hungry or not? A lot of people do, and then feel crappy afterwards.

If the goal is to eat when you’re hungry, does that mean regular meal times are out? No, it doesn’t mean that at all. But figuring out how to make your hunger coincide with meal times is actually a skill. People trying to stop emotional eating probably won’t be able to do this immediately.

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Diet Mentality and the Holidays

Question: What is the surest way to lose all control over yourself during the holiday season and gain massive amounts of weight?

Answer: The diet mentality – attempting to control your eating through externally imposed rules and self-deprivation

Dieting means eating according to externally derived rules that are independent of what you want or need. People turn to external rules because they don’t feel they have the ability to make reasonable choices on their own. A few thousand episodes of not having control in the past will tend to reinforce this lack of self-trust, but in fact you can relearn natural, internal control of your eating if you approach it in the right way. It’s not that you can’t get there, it’s that you don’t know how to get there.

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